O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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