I want to stick my p in your. b.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
