Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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