Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
