i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He is an equal opportunity slut.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize