Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
We need a shit load of segways right now
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
