Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
