Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
