I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
