I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize