so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
