Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize