Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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