So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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