When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize