He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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