Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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