Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
