Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Randomize
