Do you still have your period?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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