I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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