It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
