did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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