goodnight i made you a song goodbye
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
