My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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