used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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