That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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