Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
