hell yes lets make some ravioli
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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