Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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