Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize