Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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