i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Who died my cat blue again?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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