...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
