Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize