i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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