Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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