yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
