I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
