Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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