Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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