She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I want to be your penis for a week.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
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