Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
