then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
