i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
