i used baking grease as lip gloss
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
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