At least make sure they are 18
Why
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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