All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize