Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
