Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
